Walk in another man’s shoe or at least try to walk.

Walk in another man’s shoe or at least try to walk.

Walk a mile in another mans shoes is a well known phrase.
It’s interpretation is that one can not really understand what difficulties one has faced or is facing until you face the same challenges.
I belong to 4 online support groups. I read them every day offering encouragement when I can. There are many posts explaining how they don’t leave their house or bed due to the pain. I always suggest they move, even if to mailbox, even if it’s baby-steps – as long as you step.
For me going to bed has always taken time to get the right position, the pillows placed and the ice or heat applied. I have always been sore getting out of bed but I could still get out of bed on my own.
A month ago my work hours changed so that I no longer had the opporutnity to swim 5 times a week.
I entered into my longest and most painful flare. This flare was different. I had to plan my workday around when I needed to stretch with when I needed to get my reports, faxes, etc. I needed help getting in and out of bed and assistance getting in and out of car. I found myself taking tramadol, trazadone, and even vicodin. It barely touched the pain.
One of the mornings while still in bed because my left leg wouldn’t work I began to cry. I had cried a lot during this flare due to frustration of the fog and that I couldn’t find the “it” to stop this one.
This time I was crying for others. This time I understood. I realized I had judging those who said they would spend all day in bed and never leave the house.
I would comment to my family and friends that these people were hurting theirselves. Even tho as difficult and painful as it is to move if they would move they would feel better by doing so.
I wanted to say I’m sorry for every time I thought “Why don’t they just get up and move?” I never understood why they wouldn’t get out of bed, why they wouldn’t leave their homes.
I thought I’m in pain but I still get up and go to work, live my life with as a working wife and mom of a busy pre-teen. In my mind I felt that my pain is decreased because I keep moving -swimming is my savoiur : “Why can’t others?”
I’ve been so fortunate unlike many I have gone long times in-between flares, have found the opportunity to swim and the meds that work most of the time.
Although I still believe that in order to keep fighting Fibro from keeping us bed-ridden we need to move.
I will no longer be so quick to judge someone.
I will encourage and hope they have the support that I do that keeps me moving every day.
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